A few months ago I posted a story, "How Not to Beat the Breathalyzer", about a gentleman from Alberta, Canada, who was arrested for DUI and had a novel idea on how to fool the breathalyzer: While in the back seat of the police car, he simply ate his own underpants so they would absorb the alcohol in his stomach. It didn't work. I don't know what they're drinking up there, but another of our northern neighbors just arrested for drunk driving came up with yet another theory for beating the machine. From the Ottawa Sun (March 30):
TORONTO — An accused drunk driver tried but failed to foil a police breathalyzer after stuffing his mouth full of feces…. Arrested Sunday after his Ford pickup was pulled over on a highway just outside of Barrie, the 59-year-old driver was loaded into a cruiser and taken to a police station for testing…. After arriving at the station, (Sergeant James Buchanan) said the man grabbed a handful of his own waste "and placed it in his mouth, attempting to trick the breathalyzer machine." It didn't work, Buchanan said.